It’s easy to recall moments in my life when I felt like I was about to go under, the waters of life had so overwhelmed me that I felt myself gasping for breath; reaching out, and needing a hand to hold. I knew how to pray and this is what maintained my sanity during those trying times. The bondage I experienced, my greatest cry “Lord breaks these chain” Our ability to cope with the negatives the curve balls life throws at us seldom comes from outside circumstances, but rather from deep within our heart and soul. We survive based on unconscious survival skills life we learn from those who surrounded us. My mother often told my father, “do as I say but not as I do; does not work”. I have come to understand how true that statement really is.
From childhood, we are thought the things we should and should not do and how to do them; and that’s great we need these skills to survive. The unspoken lessons we learn parallel to this is the emotional and psychological development of our well- being. If every time your mother becomes angry she lashes out at you, or cursed at everyone around, that’s how you, who sat in the corner saying absolutely nothing, but you learn to accept that it is acceptable behavior when someone gets you angry. When you see your father express love to your mother through hugs, kisses, taking out the trash, and helping out around the house. You will learn that’s the way a man should treat his wife. Sorry to say the opposite is also true, a child who grows up with abusive parents, the majority of the time grows into abusers themselves or struggle with personal issues which stems from living with an abusive parent.
These are some types of issues when experienced in childhood that holds on to us like chains preventing us from fulfilling the purpose for which we were created. Today we will take a quick look at some chains in our lives that need to be broken. keeping a journal can help us through this process.
CHAINS FROM THE PAST
Today I received this very fitting video, the picture portrayed a dog lying asleep next to a tiger, bigger thank himself. The dog woke up suddenly. Upon opening his eyes he saw the tiger, the dog scampered away basically screaming and barking; One of the lessons which can be gained from that video is precisely what I would like to explore with you today. The dog’s instinct and previous knowledge told him that a tiger can be very dangerous. Instantly he ran away in an effort to protect himself. In reality, the dog was never in danger, it was a stuffed animal that lay next to him; he became a victim of his own fears.
Ask yourself the question, many times have you backed down from doing something that may have yielded positive results. The tiger of doubt and fears arise, causing us to run away in an effort to protect yourself from failure or disappointment. Based on our past experiences we chose to run in despair. The present dilemma triggered an experience from your childhood and early adult life affects, therein lies the basis for the way we respond to people, or circumstances, our personality, and the way we forgive ourselves and others. Our psychological well-being constitutes a balance between feeling good and our ability to function effectively under daily circumstances, even when we are not feeling good. Unresolved hurts becomes stored in our memory bank, to be triggered when situations arise. Fear, doubt, anxiety, shame, self-doubt are some of the chains which bind you and hinders your ability to live a full and productive life.
CHAINS OF NEGATIVE EMOTIONAL ENERGY
Negativity can be very contagious, have you ever been feeling fine your day is going well you are experiencing; when up comes someone who is dripping with gloom and doom, fearful about life, “the sky is falling type of person” by the time they depart you are feeling heavy and depressed, even though your circumstances had not changed. Without realizing it that person had contaminated you; their negative energy has influenced your state of mind.
If this can happen just from being in the presence of someone. What happens to us when we grow up in a negative environment. There are persons who can’t seem to help themselves, you throw them a birthday party and they are still sulky and unhappy. Chances are they have lived in negativity and it has become their temperament, their personality, it’s their normal. IT IS MEDICALLY PROVEN this type of negativity can increase the risk of heart disease, breathing-related issues, and other diseases. It poisons your emotional well-being. These chains must be broken.
We often make the error of thinking when we forgive someone we are doing them a favor, quite contrary to this notion lies the truth; we are in fact doing ourselves the favor. I recall reading a book where there was a young woman who was ill with an undiagnosed illness, for a number of years. The situation grew so severe that she was at the point of death. Faced with the realization that she was about to die, she chose to make amends with her father who she had not spoken to for years. She desired to forgive him before she died. She made arrangements for him to visit her so they can make their peace before her passing. The day came and they both cleared the air, they embraced and he left. To everyone’s amazement, that night she slept well, the following day she began to eat regular meals, and with each passing day, her condition improved. After, a couple of months her illness was no more. This unexpected turn of events was attributed to the decision she made to forgive her father. Research has now proven that forgiveness leads to major illnesses such as cancer. When we carry around unforgiveness in our lives, it poisons us from the inside out. It binds us in chains that need to be broken.
CHAINS OF REJECTION
Millions of people struggle with this every day; attached to this comes feelings of depression and a lack of purpose for living. This is a sad reality that can go undetected for years. It is possible to be living a life which appears complete and fulfilling, while at the same time carry feelings of rejection. The root cause lies deep within our mother’s womb. For many what is supposed to be a safe place, was not. It may have been safe physically but not emotionally and psychologically.
When, a pregnant woman experiences abandonment by the father of the child, or rejection by her parents or peers these feels transfers to the unborn child. The results being a child who now enters the world feeling, unloved and rejected. These feelings are chains which retards the process of happiness during the lifetime of that individual if those chains are not broken.
We have covered quite a lot this week, and there other chains which can be added to this list. Join me next week as we continue this discussion. My desire is for you to live a life that’s free and fulfilling. I look forward to your comment on how our discussion has impacted.
Love & Blessings
Suzanna, Founder Break Every Chain